Since film critics have had a field day comparing Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes remake to the original 1968 sci-fi classic, isn’t it fair for us to juxtapose Danny Elfman’s new score with Jerry Goldsmith’s classic 1968 masterpiece? I think so. In fact, the Goldsmith Planet of the Apes was the first totally serial film score (I mean serial as in 12-tone music, not film serials!). You don’t have to know that in order to appreciate Goldsmith’s inventive, exciting, and brilliantly orchestrated music. Elfman follows a rather different recipe, as follows: Take lots of slow-moving tuneless melody lines, murky sustained chords, and triadic harmony in the spirit of (what else) Holst’s The Planets, and pile on lots of busy, aggressive percussion both real and sampled to give the impression that the music is moving when it really is not. Make sure everything’s half-baked, and don’t return the stolen ingredients. Yield: one mega-serving of Elfman’s Planet of the Apes score. Oops, I almost forgot the harp flourishes that impart a welcome breath of swish tinkle into a bleak, monochromatic sound world. You almost wonder if this music was actually composed by the apes themselves!
Compared to Elfman’s glorious, gothic Batman score, or his heartracing theme to The Simpsons, his latest celluloid effort sounds positively cell-phoned in, on auto-palm-pilot, no less. Before you dump this disc in your “bring to the second-hand CD store” bag, clone Paul Oakenfold’s “Rule the Planet Remix” for your trusty homemade rave compilation.
